www.NotFeelingIt.com

What is Easter anyways? Working at Walmart - I've witnessed a Christmas-like chaos this Easter, thousands of people buying baskets to fill with chocolate, candy, orange and green marshmellow bunnies and toys. Who came up with this bunny/candy idea??

All the customers keep wishing me a Happy Easter and everytime I keep thinking - what is Easter to them; watching their kids hunt for eggs? I know what it is for me... Somehow we have to bring the real Easter back!

Where is Jesus? I've only seen the Easter Bunny: twice actually....

Even for me this Easter just doesn't feel right... I think that majority of the reason is because its my first time away from home and the church I grew up in, I didn't get a chance to attend a Good Friday service, because I worked the 12-9pm....

For me Easter is being with family, celebrating Jesus and what He did for us, singing Because He Lives, Christ Arose, At the Cross, Lead Me to Calvary, My Redeemer Lives, The Old Rugged Cross, He Lives, The King is Coming! Its also eating lots of food with family..... hence the reason, I keep asking Nick what he wants to eat this weekend since he is my only family to eat Easter food with!! At least I have him.

I can only blame work for not letting me go to Ohio, I can only blame immigrating for not letting me go home and this Easter... It was soo hard hearing my parents talking about how all the Austins would be over after the Good Friday service for lunch and stuff!! Even Dana and Michael were there again and not me - just like at Christmas!! The other thing that saddens me - which isn't just an Easter thing, but waking up on a Sunday morning and hearing either my dad or my mom playing the piano.. that is one of the sounds I would not want to live without!!

We're planning to go to church Sunday at the JaxNaz church again, I think.... either that or the Spring Arbor one! Hopefully then I will feel like its Easter. I have a Palm branch on the dashboard of my car that we got last week at the JaxNaz. I've kept it there to remind me everytime I get in my car, that Easter is more than the candy that came in the mail, and more than the commercial-ness this world has made it.